Hasya Kavi Sammelan

Was looking for some interesting videos to watch on Youtube today, and landed up on a Hasya Kavi Sammelan video conducted in IIT KGP. That got me started into a journey into the past. My father has always been a great fan of Kavi Sammelan’s (literally, a congregation of poets), and as a kid we used to go for many performances during the festival seasons of Holi and Diwali.

Great thing about these are – unlike the idiot boxes of today – the poets would mix humour with social messages, the humour would be very clean and simple, weaved together using perfect verse and recited eloquently. Those days are now over – what we enjoy today is Big Boss, and stand up comedy where in most cases men dress up as women and act stupid (don’t get me wrong — that’s also fun and enjoyable, but these lack the depth).

So, here’s a peep into the past and a few verses I discovered today. I’ll start with Ashok Chakradhar in his brilliant Buddhe Bacche aka Galiyaan:

Moving next, the brilliant poet who creates humour with a straight face, Surendra Sharma:

Continuing the Haryanvi Streak of Humour, Arun Jemini:

No kavi sammelan is complete without a poem of the veer ras (war poetry), and presenting Hari Om Panwar:

Next up, is the grand old man, Shail Chaturvedi:

And thus, we come to the end of the ceremony with Shailesh Lodha, a young poet but worth a watch:

Thank you guys! And hope you enjoyed the show :)

Mall’spitol

I recently spent a couple of days at a hospital in Bangalore. While the drab green/grey/white walls can be a bore, there is a lot of humour especially because a hospital is probably the most far removed from the rest of our lives. Once, you enter into the confines of one, you get completely transformed — your priorities change, the way you interact with people changes etc.

But what would happen if we become as aggressive in a hospital as elsewhere? As in a mall? We all search for deals, try to get bargains … how would that pan out in a hospital?

• Special offer on hospitals meals — get double the quantity for half the price! (and still have food left since nobody wants to eat it)
• Replace one kidney, and we replace the second one for 50% off!
• Flat 25% off on CAT Scans every Thursday — avail of the offer now!
• Make one baby, and we give you two for the same price!
• New Arrivals: Injections that hurt 25% more at the same price — try them now!
• Tooth Fairy Special: Replace all 32 teeth for only Rs. 2000 — offer valid only for the next 2 days
• Visit a Neurologist and we let you consult a Psychiatrist absolutely free!
• Holiday offer: Stay 2 nights and 3 days in our special resort with a spa and nurse on call — get your brain replaced for as little as Rs. 15,000.

Better still, the following conversation:

Patient: Doctor, heart kya bhav diya?

Doctor: Bouji, yeh wala drunkard hai Rs. 5000, yeh wala cigarette peeta tha – Rs. 4000, Yeh bilkul normal tha – Rs. 10000

Patient: Theek daam batao bhaiya. Aajkal bahut daam badhane lage ho. Woh Reliance fresh mein toh 3000 ka mil raha hai.

Doctor: Bouji, ab woh le lo aap. Woh toh Tutankhamen ka nikaal ke bhech denge aapko.

And what about the advertisements? Will there be an ad-supported heart transplant? Will they put banner ads or text ads? How will they measure CPMs? How many times does the consumer want to buy everytime she looks at a saree or jewellery? They might even sell prepaid cards: After sometime, you would have to recharge if you wanted to continue breathing or your heart beating.

The way things are going — this day is not far. In my own hospital stay, they didn’t expedite the discharge process until somebody else had ‘checked into’ the other bed in the room (I was in twin-sharing).

Ghor Kalyug.