All For A Bottle of Wine

After a long day of long deliberation, long discussion and longer cups of coffee, a lot of shopping which left me feeling guilty and compromised, and having missed the Fireflimageies festival (Wikipedia and an older review), we decided we could hold more discussions with a bottle of wine. And thus, we walked into a shop on MG Road, and in a fateful moment, we decided to go for Cabernet-Shiraz from the vineyards of Grover, very near Bangalore. In fact, it was the geographical proximity that clinched the deal for Grover, blessed be his wine!

Once at home, the setting had to be perfect, and nothing better than Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring to see some cool and calm action. Now, the setting was perfect, and after biting a few nibbles, we were ready for the celebration.

Drumrolls… the wine bottle was opened, and Murphy couldn’t desert me just like every other time, and he came in the form of a cork. Sula‘s are better — the bottles don’t have cork, but now we were stuck at home at 11 in the night, with a bottle of wine but no cork-opener. And no Swiss Army knife. And two guys really really desperate to have the wine. Not a pretty sight.

Never learnt to accept defeat, did we? All our engineering prowess had to come to use now. The cork would be subjected to a number of implements over the next hour without respite, until it yielded to our superior knowledge of stress, tension and torque. The first up was the common fork, spotless and stainless, benign usually, but a mighty force in the hands of a master. The fork was sharply thrust into the cork, and as we flexed our biceps in applying the torque, there was a loud clank and we thought the cork had popped.

But no, the cork was stronger than we expected, and it was the fork that had clanked. Far stronger than expected — it was smartly using all the vacuum inside the bottle to bolster its position, and putting up a seemingly winning fight. We almost accepted defeat, but suddenly, we were reminded of our machine tools class, and all the filing and minute working of the lathe we had practiced. A frantic search started in the house — something sharp and long.

And thus, a lot of search found us our next weapon for our next battle. A small pair of scissors, innocuous but intense, and after a few rounds of sharpening it on the granite (like a true expert!), we again thrust it into the cork. The cork seemed to open it mouth, and engulfed the scissor’s blade. A whale gulping down the missiles we fired at it. And we would have none of it. More throwing of pots and pans around, cleaning up our messy kitchen, moving heaven and earth, and we found the knife we had gotten free with our stove-lighter.

Not a Rampuri, but baleful and unrelenting, the knife was the perfect tool for our fresh attack. The bottle was held tight with both hands and the knife thrust in it. After it refused to go in further, it was hammered in further with all the pots and pans we had cleaned up. The knife was turned, and yes(!), the cork unscrewed as well. Success is tasty, and wine is tempting, and we continued with the attack. The cork started giving in finally, but brittle as it was, it broke, and we had to cut parts of it off, and repeat the process. Finally, as it seemed to be succumbing, we upped the effort, and in one giant pop something happened.

Wine was all over us. The glass of the bottle had broken off from the side, and some of the wine had spilled all over the kitchen. Thankfully, damage had been limited to the wine bottle, and not to our hands or the kitchen. But yes, we had won! We had finally prevailed over the corky and cranky enemy. Wine was ours to be had.

And what better way to celebrate than a bottle of Wine. Cheers!

About kpowerinfinity
I *♥* technology, business, conversations, experiences, books, music, theater, coffee and people. I am an entrepreneur in the city of Bangalore - my company, Capillary, provides customer engagement programs and marketing services to retailers around the world.

8 Responses to All For A Bottle of Wine

  1. rahul says:

    yo kk singh. tempo se.

    me recently had a similar battle with plastic packaging of a SD card.

  2. yo rahul singh! Blog shuru karo… tumhare bhi experiences padhenge :-)

  3. gaurav says:

    ha ha! great post. you sound like a typical fellow punjabi molesting a butter chicken :-) i would have thought you’d do such things AFTER you finished the bottle.
    btw, how’d you find the wine? i tried it recently as well and found it pretty ok
    also, i know now what to get you for your birthday!
    cheers, gaurav

  4. saurabh says:

    simply superb……the way u hv narrated the whole thing with humor along with the desperate need to open the cork….
    by the way….all good wines hv corks. wines without corks are not aged in oak. since oak is costly, only the real good vineyards have it. the cork allows slow fermenting of the wine after the oak stage. older the wine the better. slow fermenting refines the taste. go for a 5-7 years aged wine…they r real good
    once u open a wine bottle it has to be finished. if it is not,u hv to throw the wine away. it suddenly starts fermenting n that is the end of a wine.

    u write real well. i kno wat to buy if i hv to give you a gift!!!!!

  5. puresunshine says:

    you have such generous readers. u write about wine and they are all ready to buy you one! why dont u write about stuff i want and u can pass them on to me once u get them! hahaha! jokes apart, fun post! LOTR and wine! pretty cool!

  6. @gaurav: After the bottle, for a change, I was fast asleep. No nautanki for once! The wine was decent, I would really not mind it ;-)

    @saurabh: I agree. They are good, that’s why they’re used. But then, the other question is about convenience. And somewhere we need to make a trade-off. And once again, I won’t mind the wine ;-)

    @puresunshine: You already got the free watch. Ha ha ha ;-) Yup, believe me the borgs and the orcs look real under its influence :P

  7. Pingback: Alcohol Drinks and Birthdays » All For A Bottle of Wine kpowerinfinity

  8. Hi,
    This article about grover vineyards and indian wine is very interesting.
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    fell free to visit the following website
    I will take time now to read others post on this great blog ;-)
    Remember dont drink too much wine if you dont want authorities delete it from market :-)

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